So, it’s been building. That overwhelmed feeling that comes in around Thanksgiving and builds until after New Year’s Day.
Can I do what I need to do in time? What am I forgetting? Things cost too much. Can I make people happy or happier? What? When? How? Oh shit. Then the occasional panic attack, the deep breathing, the thought that at least I’m not trying to bake cookies for everyone (circa the 1970’s – 1980’s). Maybe I should host a cookie bake party. We could drink adult beverages and… Or then, that might be too much, too.
Then there were the days when I felt compelled to write Christmas greetings individually on each card that I sent. And I am verbose in my writing…so, this made me exhausted. I was going to night school, and really trying to be and do everything… I think. After work, I went to class. On the weekends, I studied. Then there was some amount of “free” time which seems ludicrous to me now. The expectation that I thought was there, might have been in my head. I don’t know.
And of course came hosting the holiday meals. I took this plunge one year, when I didn’t know I was expecting, but somehow the smell of collard greens cooking knocked me back! And I love collard greens! Yep, it wasn’t long before other things happened and I made an appointment at my doctor’s office, and you guessed it. A September baby was coming!
But, here I am forty and decades later plus a couple of years. No babies to expect (of my own). Only the drive to have a happy holiday with family, friends, and pray for Peace during these times of turmoil that seems to be everywhere.
The prayers are endless. Pray for the impact of the pandemic to lessen. Pray for a better economic situation for everyone in the world. Pray for those who are alone. Pray for those who are sick and in need of help. Pray for the homeless and those suffering difficulties due to mental health issues… And especially for the people in Ukraine who were needlessly and cruelly attacked.
In answer to the hysteria of the holidaze around here… I can do things to mitigate the stress. I
Then maybe, I could just go out and take a run or jump in the pool (yes, it’s still warm outside in December it’s been in the 80’s F for a couple of weeks…).
Welcome to climate change. A curse of humankind, but potentially it’s what happens in end times if someone in the distant past seeded this planet and set this in motion. It could be significant that there are multiple rule books that have been written – multiple versions that have a disparate appeal, depending…
But, then, it’s the holidays. We should be having a good time.
So, why all this stress during the holidays? Lots of theories out there…
I get told that I shouldn’t decorate so much. But it does help me to remember happy times with people who aren’t here anymore. Yes, it makes me sad, but then it makes me think about how much love there was and how they were, when they were here. Some of the decorations are really old – antiques by now, seriously. I do treasure them, because I treasure the people whose these were. The historical significance of these is immeasurable.
Going out to stores to shop is crazy these days. Anything from the angry men driving the two story trucks, to the impatient women all dressed up in hot fashion just to go to the grocery store…
I just get in the mode of, WTF? Can you people just relax, already? Then, I say to myself, “look who’s talking…” Eye roll. Get a grip! I guess it just depends on the person and the stress that they suffer, and how they decide to manage it.
Me, I don’t think people should need to look intimidating. It just puts people off. I sometimes think I should experiment and say to the driver, if I got the chance, “Do you need a hug?” But, I don’t. I suppress my impulses to do something that could land me in a lot of trouble. People here are not very friendly. It’s a real mixed crowd. As long as the goats stay away from the cows, everything is fine for them, if you get my drift. Color outside the lines and they’ll be trouble.
So, as I go about my business, I will keep trying to enjoy the next two weeks as best as I can and remember my family and friends even if it is in the tiniest of ways and gestures – of kind words, and do my part in trying to take the pressure off. I definitely need to practice at this. Learn something new every day!
Leading up to the crescendo of Christmas and the Twelve Days thereof, what I always like to say at some point is:
Wishing You and Yours, Peace on Earth, and Goodwill towards Humankind!
