Cloudier days, sometimes cold, earlier sundown – heck, we just start feeling like we should be hibernating! Like bears in a cave, we tend to be less active – or at least it takes more effort to be active – and all that comes is contributing to our feelings of a down mood.
After the holidays, especially, we either think it’s time to quit eating and drinking – but then, there’s birthdays in January, then there’s anniversaries and Valentines Day, and more birthdays in February… and before we know it, it’s Mardi Gras, and then it’s Easter, and so on and so forth – by that time, we’re coming out of the doldrums.
When I was a kid, I could never put my finger on it – I just knew that I felt like sleeping a lot more. Low energy. Not quite ready to jump up and do anything. Listless and lackluster was what we called it. I think that this is an excellent description, honestly.
Sometimes I jump on Twitter and find a thread where people are posting crazy and funny responses to something. That’s always a bonus vs. the intense arguments and harsh stuff that some people tweet. It’s a crazy time right now and everyone is pretty fed-up with things, pick your thing…
But, this “seasonal affect disorder” or whatever they call it – it’s real and intense for some folks – I was reminded recently where some folks buy a special kind of light that helps fool your body into thinking it’s out in the sunshine. I just go outside when the sun is out. That helps.
Seventeen years ago, I was on a journey of healing from intense grief over losing my younger son. I think that I am reminded of that during this time of year. Of course, I think about it all the time, intermittently – and I think about him – and I miss him, a lot. I guess, I miss what he would have been doing – and imagine what having him grow up would have been like – how he and his brother would have gotten along – maybe improved, even though they were on good terms when he passed away… It’s not that.
But, I am fortunate to still have contact with his best friend, and this makes me feel like he is around (because he is). I choose to try to not be SAD. I can’t wait for the sun to stay up longer. That’s a turning point, for me. Every year, I think of this and the history of this time of year in my life.
I have much to be thankful for, when I think about it – it’s a lot of big blessings that I have in my life. Of course, I miss my son, my parents, and grandparents. I can’t bring them back, but I can treasure my memories of them and remember the best times over the worst times.
