all these years. yep. it is a fact, day by day, we never know what comes around the corner. finding eggs, after hunting for them all over the place… an early adopter. pastel colored eggs were and still are attractive. not sure why that is. early exposure.
in my life, if I think of it at a certain level of abstraction, there have been puzzles to solve. always.
I can also remember bits and pieces of early childhood vividly. sometimes the smells. sometimes just the scenes. sometimes the voices of my grandmother and mother, talking together, drinking coffee and smoking cigarettes, or with my godmothers, always doing some sort of project.
it was an interesting early life, always something going on – activity – not much sitting around – mostly, inventive, clever, fun. there was always fun factor. enjoyment was king. maybe since it was just a few years after the war ended, they recognized the value of enjoyment and fun factor.
I grew up around a lot of adults, and kids, sometimes, but mostly, it was adult-oriented – and sometimes alone – left to play by myself, or supposedly napping – sometimes I did nap, but mostly not.
I kind of like puzzles. Hard to solve ones, but satisfying if I do. The life challenges, however, can begin to wear you down – you need a re-charge and once in awhile – you get it, that, sometimes a new challenge is actually energizing, not draining. Change of scenery.
Just when you are greatly comforted, that’s when something happens. Almost if comfortable is a warning sign. This is the anthem of the anxious. Perhaps, I am a bit anxious, but calmly so, if that makes any sense. To those of you out there who share this, it will make sense.
but worrying is genetic, I’ve decided. still haven’t been able to Zen around it… guess I got that from my Dad, he was chief of the worriers – did it for all of us – but, I guess, I take his place in that. Must surround myself with Zen people. Chill. That’s it. But not easy.
