How many times have I done this? Answer = 61. Wow. That is a lot of cycles, but guess what! There are people out there that have done more cycles than I have… plenty.
Every year we get new stuff. New time coming at us. New events. New something to look forward to doing or seeing. Or hearing. Or experiencing. Or worrying about. Oh gosh, don’t go down that rat hole…
This year was different in many ways. First, I returned after having spent more time away from my home-base contiguously than I ever have in my life. That was an interesting process of adaptation and adoption. I don’t think I ever really got used to it, which points out that my barometer for change is probably less than optimal.
I tried to settle, but then something else would change. We had a lot of stuff. This did not make it easy. Not knowing what the environment would be like – and knowing that we would be stopping off in colder climes, I brought what I thought might work, but as it turns out, I probably could have done with jeans, shorts, tees, tanks, sandals, fishing clothes, walking shoes, and gear — and maybe a couple of summery dress up items…
It was about our family trying to make us feel like we had a home, but then there were aspects that made me feel like we really had boundaries that could not make this happen. That ol’ “interfering” or “being in the way” subtle messaging that often emerges in awhile, after you have been there, and your edges begin to encroach on other people’s edges. No matter what you do, there isn’t that total integration that happens. My grandfather, and then my dad, told me something one time that is as true today, as it ever was: “like fish – you stay around too long and you get stinky” meaning, if you overstay you become bad company. Despite people insisting that this is not the case, the human tendencies creep through eventually. Good ol’ human nature – we are what we are.
Let’s say that all in all we had a great time. We are indebted and forever grateful for our family’s enabling us to have a home base for as long as we needed, and for their great patience applied to having us there as long as we did not get too stinky – and if we didn’t smell like fish, at least we caught enough to keep everyone fed! Thank you dear ones for your kindness, love, generosity and hospitality!
Love, -Ellen
